world war 3?

So I haven’t really posted a blog in quite a while. But I would like to take the time to set out the full, complete, and truthful reason as to why this is. I have been held hostage by a large number of steroid taking bees and bright red wasp’s who are staging world war 3 on my balcony.

It all began when the weather changed from freezing cold to stifling hot (which happened in a matter of days might I add) and the number of insects begin to increase in an exponential manner. At first I was mildly amused by the bees and only slightly afraid of the wasps.

These bees are not like the small and humble bees which can be found back home, but instead a giant monstrosity of a bee. It is the size of my thumb from the knuckle to the end. Huge right? They used to just come and scope out the area, buzzing around in the one spot but then moving out without much problems.




The wasps were always a bit of a problem, but in all honesty I appreciate their honesty. They are a pest, and they don’t pretend to be anything else. They have set up camp in a nearby location and are often flying around sneakily. They have even been known to enter my house (I think it’s because they are spying on me and scoping out the territory that they are trying to win).




Like I said, these bees had lulled me into a false sense of security. I stupidly thought that these oversized bugs were simply gentle giants. The other day I had bravely ventured out on to the balcony for a little bit of sun and to read a paper. I was just sitting there minding my own business when I suddenly felt as though I was being watched. I was content to ignore the crazy stalker stare until a small but distinctly yellow blob of liquid landed on my paper.

“You have to be fucking kidding me?!?! Did a bee just pee on my homework?!”

I think up to this point I had been pretty tolerable of their imposing presence. I hadn’t called in anyone to exterminate the pests, even though I had every right. I had been stared down, I have been swooped, I have been chased inside, barricaded in my room, and now a fricken bee had peed on my homework.. COME ON!

The anger took over me and I looked up and I came face to face with the menacing eyes of a bee. I read somewhere that one should never make eye contact with an angry animal and I wondered fleetingly if this applied to bees. As I was preoccupied with my life that was flashing before my eyes I noticed the buzzing had been upgraded from slightly annoying to intolerable.

There on my balcony, open for everyone to see the wasps had finally launched their attack on the bees. There were aerial battles going on everywhere. I ducked and weaved through the battling insects and tried with little success to get into my apartment whilst keeping the war outside. I had witnessed bees attacking wasps, wasps attached to bees, even a set of bees attacking each other. I was shocked. I was appalled. I was scared.

And this, my friends, is the exact and truthful reason that I haven’t posted any blogs lately.